Father sends invoice after child’s birthday
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Soap bubbles, stickers, sweets: A father wanted the costs of his son’s birthday party back from other parents. The story raises a larger question.
Netherlands – Small gift bags at children’s birthday parties are taken for granted – until a father from the Netherlands questioned this tradition. Instead of covering the cost of the content himself, he sent a detailed invoice to all parents in the class. The demand: 1.83 euros per child. The reactions didn’t take long to arrive.
Dutch blogger Nova Mulder reported the incident on her blog Mama Plaats. Just a week earlier, she had celebrated her daughter’s fifth birthday – with lovingly packed bags for all the guests, as is tradition. Then the message came in the class WhatsApp group.
Detailed cost breakdowns after the child’s birthday make people shake their heads
The father of a classmate not only asked for a contribution, but also provided a complete breakdown. “There was actually a list of bubble machines, candy, stickers and favor bags, complete with decimal prices,” Mulder writes. There is also a payment link – as if it were a normal invoice.
Mulder read the message twice before she could believe it wasn’t a joke. A discussion quickly broke out in the group. Some parents thought the amount was too small to get upset. Others simply thought the action was outrageous.
Blogger criticizes: “You can’t burden yourself with the bill”
For Mulder it was about more than 1.83 euros. “For me, a small birthday treat is simply a must. You decide for yourself how much you spend on it. And you can’t pass the bill on to the rest of the class afterwards?” The father finally drew conclusions: As resistance grew, he deleted the payment link without comment.
The story hits a social nerve. Children’s birthdays have developed into elaborate events in recent years. Party favors are no longer a voluntary gesture, but a must. Loud Parents’ magazine “Increasingly larger and more expensive gifts sometimes lead to competition between families.”
Costs for children’s parties are often in the three-digit range
The Business Week reports that parents today often spend three-digit sums on children’s birthday parties. Instead of banging pots and sausages, many families book entertainers, trampoline parks or complete packages with bouncy castles and cotton candy. Theme parties, where everything from the invitation card to the guest gift is coordinated, are considered standard.
Social educator Dana Mundt from the Federal Conference for Educational Advice explains to the Business Week: “There is a concern that your own child, who was a guest at a trampoline party, will look worse in front of his friends if you just organize a pot-hitting party.” Behind this is also the fear of being perceived as a bad parent.
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Food for thought instead of excitement
Social media like Instagram adds to the pressure. Perfect pictures of lavishly decorated celebrations set standards that many families can hardly meet financially and in terms of time. The story of the Dutch father therefore raises a fundamental question: Is all the effort surrounding party favors and themed parties still in proportion to what it’s actually about – that a child celebrates with his friends? (Sources: mamaplaats.nl; elternzeitung.de; wiwo.de) (jade)